A new bride was a bit embarrassed to be known as a
honeymooner. So when she and her husband pulled up
to the hotel, she asked him if there was any way
that they could make it appear that they had been
married a long time. He responded, "Sure. You
carry the suitcases!"
A doctor says to his patient, “I have a bad news and a worse news”. “Oh dear, what’s the bad news?” – asks the patient. The doctor replies, “You only have 24 hours to live.” “That’s terrible,” said the patient. “How can the news possibly be worse?” The doctor replies, “I’ve been trying to contact you since yesterday.”
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